Greater Manchester has witnessed a series of comically unfortunate criminal escapades, showcasing the incompetence of some crooks. From burglars getting stuck to robbers losing their loot, this article by the M.E.N. highlights some particularly hapless criminals from the region.

Stuck in a Window

A burglar attempting to break into a pensioner’s home in Radcliffe, Bury, got his head stuck in a bathroom window. The 60-year-old householder returned from shopping to find him wedged in the first-floor window, about 15 feet off the ground. She called 999, and police officers along with firefighters took around 20 minutes to free the would-be thief.

The burglar, who injured his ear during the incident, was arrested and sentenced to two years and four months in prison in January 2017 after pleading guilty to burglary with intent to steal. Sergeant Richard Garland from the GMP Whitefield team remarked on the “poetic justice” served, noting the distress it caused to the elderly resident.

Blowing in the Wind

In March 2018, two robbers in Droylsden held up a travel agency, stuffing cash down their trousers. However, during their escape, a sudden gust of wind blew their loot out onto the street. One of the robbers frantically tried to collect the bills but abandoned the attempt as he risked being hit by an oncoming car.

Despite the police releasing CCTV footage and appealing for witnesses, the duo escaped justice, leaving the scene empty-handed.

Follow the Money

In January 2016, Christopher Bowyer and Christopher Myatt attempted to rob an ATM at a petrol station in Cheadle, Stockport using explosive gas. They managed to steal £25,000, but left behind £2,500 in cash scattered at the scene.

Police followed the money trail and tracked the pair to the M56 gantry, where they attempted to hide. After being apprehended, it was revealed Myatt was so frightened he refused to climb down. The court discovered detailed evidence of their plans and both men pleaded guilty to causing an explosion and theft, with sentences of eight years and seven and a half years respectively.

The ‘Poor Individual’ Who Left a Rucksack Full of Drugs on the Tram

In 2019, Greater Manchester Police humorously recounted a case where a man forgot a rucksack containing drugs on the Metrolink. The rucksack also contained his name and address, much to the amusement of social media users.

The rucksack contained various drugs and scales as well as a Community Payback card. The police's Facebook post appealing for the owner elicited laughter, with comments highlighting the absurdity of the situation.